Sample Mail vom 07.05.2002 ( Mail 2 ):
Subject: JOKES: EURO English und EURO-Deutsch [ TXT und PDF ]
Hallo Linguistik-Philosophen!
Hier eine wirklich interessante Variante, unsere Schriftsprache nicht nur schneller, sondern auch extrem viel kürzer zu gestalten. Was die Verständlichkeit angeht.... ach ist ja auch egal. Hier nun erst mal die englische Variante:
Subject: euro english
The European Commission have
just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language
of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part
of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spelling
had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that
would be known as "EuroEnglish": In the first year, "s" will replace the
soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The
hard "c" will be dropped in favor of the "k". This should klear up konfusion
and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.
There will be growing publik
enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced
with the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse
of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated
changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters,
which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre
that the horible mes of the silent "e"'s in the language is disgraceful,
and they should go away.
By the 4th yar, peopl wil
be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining
"ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz yer, ve vil
hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and
evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!
Eine deutsche Variante ist als PDF [13 KB ] angehängt. Bitte um entsprechende Würdigung! Die schönsten Kommentare werden geposted.... :-)
ikweisniktobichdafursinsol
istdoketwasgewonunksbedurftik fileiktbiniksualtfursoeineumstelung aberplatsspartesschonundwaredaherefisienter
vilspasundsonetak fergisniktheutesulaken
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